so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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