I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Randomize
