something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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