I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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