I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
