Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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