What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Randomize
