You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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