He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
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Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
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You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I'm having to shit out rocks
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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