I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
I think i got beer on your cat.
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