I've blown a few things in my day
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
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