That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
We have so much sex to catch up on
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Randomize
