he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
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