i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
it's great music for shaving your balls
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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