ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Randomize
