so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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