So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
