I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
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