Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Randomize
