i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize