When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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