go do what you do best...puke behind churches
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
You have to summon your inner elephant
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
