that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Randomize
