Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
