the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
You were trust falling into bushes
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
