they need to just BURY HIM!
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
