whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Randomize