airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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