Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Randomize
