Heybabeimwearingurpanties
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
sarcasm needs its own font
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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