Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize