and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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