so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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