Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
