if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
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