she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Randomize
