I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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