Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
