we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
