I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize
