yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize