Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Just high enough for therapy.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Randomize
