did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Randomize
