Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
She bit a glass in half.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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