Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
