My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Your cock deserves a montage
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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