the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize
