wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
