At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
