YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
