As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Are we in a gay sports bar?
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Randomize
